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wtfstyls:

 In grade 8 I really hated this girl so I collected the sugar from my pack of sour patch kids and gave it to her saying its cocaine and she actually  snorted it and at recess she pretended she was high and she was called crack whore for the rest of the year. Now she does real crack and blames me saying I got her addicted. She still doesnt know it was just sugar

28 Aug ♥ 347,752 notes ● via source - reblog
kingjaffejoffer:

willthewriter:

very true

if you cant get through the first stage without time running out you deserved to die

kingjaffejoffer:

willthewriter:

very true

if you cant get through the first stage without time running out you deserved to die

28 Aug ♥ 109,909 notes ● via source - reblog

sly-mcp:

whothefuckisalexturner:

abhortion:

ginnifergoodwins:

foodtrucker:

‘it’s not cold’ said the PE teacher with a coat on

#glad to know it’s international

#’it’s just drizzling’ said the PE teacher opening an umbrella

“running for 20 minutes isn’t that bad”, said the PE teacher from the chair

‘you’ve got to stay healthy’ said the PE teacher eating a mars bar

“Being on your period is no excuse.” said the male PE teacher with no uterus

28 Aug ♥ 678,723 notes ● via source - reblog
jack-baraatwat:

evolvedkinkycanuck:

avengersonna:

pvtleonardchurch:

jack-baraatwat:

Being friends with me consists of me sending you bad jokes at 2:47 in the morning

listen up you motherfucker

Who names someone fucktardshitcorn

if I sent friends bad jokes at 2 am. when they probably wanted to go to sleep, I probably would have shit in my name too.. 

Actually my name in her phone has an octopus soooo

jack-baraatwat:

evolvedkinkycanuck:

avengersonna:

pvtleonardchurch:

jack-baraatwat:

Being friends with me consists of me sending you bad jokes at 2:47 in the morning

listen up you motherfucker

Who names someone fucktardshitcorn

if I sent friends bad jokes at 2 am. when they probably wanted to go to sleep, I probably would have shit in my name too.. 

Actually my name in her phone has an octopus soooo

28 Aug ♥ 144,107 notes ● via source - reblog
silversora:

"Dave.."
"Fuck off Shaun I am taking a picture."
"DAVE."

silversora:

"Dave.."

"Fuck off Shaun I am taking a picture."

"DAVE."

28 Aug ♥ 440,666 notes ● via source - reblog
blazedclone:

Khajiit is not sure about this trade, Dragonborn.

blazedclone:

Khajiit is not sure about this trade, Dragonborn.

28 Aug ♥ 203,045 notes ● via source - reblog
28 Aug ♥ 940 notes ● via source - reblog
tssfxx:

helllotittys:

have—not:

i love this photo because at first you think that she was going to get married but instead her husband to be left her, or something like that. but actually its quite the opposite. i clicked on the source and it brought me to an article explaining the story behind this photo, and shes not crying, shes hungover. her and her husband went to a football game on their wedding day, and got extremely drunk and partied all night. they took the subway home because they couldn’t drive. so no, its not a sad heartbreaking story, its a crazy joyful one. which in my opinion makes the picture even more amazing.


CAN PEOPLE PLEASE REBLOG THE PIC WITH THIS CAPTION^ AND NOT THE ONE WHERE EVERYONE IS SAD AND ARE LIKE “POOR GIRL GOD BLESS”

tssfxx:

helllotittys:

have—not:

i love this photo because at first you think that she was going to get married but instead her husband to be left her, or something like that. but actually its quite the opposite. i clicked on the source and it brought me to an article explaining the story behind this photo, and shes not crying, shes hungover. her and her husband went to a football game on their wedding day, and got extremely drunk and partied all night. they took the subway home because they couldn’t drive. so no, its not a sad heartbreaking story, its a crazy joyful one. which in my opinion makes the picture even more amazing.

CAN PEOPLE PLEASE REBLOG THE PIC WITH THIS CAPTION^ AND NOT THE ONE WHERE EVERYONE IS SAD AND ARE LIKE “POOR GIRL GOD BLESS”

28 Aug ♥ 999,767 notes ● via source - reblog

Mr. Van Houten:

I’m a good person but a shitty writer. You’re a shitty person but a good writer. I think we’d make a good team. I don’t want to ask you for any favors but if you have the time—from what I saw you have plenty— Please fix this for me. It’s a eulogy for Hazel…. she asked me to write it and I’m trying, it just could use a little flare.

See the thing is we all want to be remembered but Haze’s different. Hazel knows the truth. She didn’t want a million admirers she just wanted one. And she got it. Maybe she wasn’t loved widely but she was loved deeply, and isn’t that more than what most of us get? When Hazel was sick I knew I was dying but I didn’t want to say so. She was in the ICU and I snuck in for ten mins and sat with her before I got caught. Her eyes were closed, her skin pale, but her hands were still her hands. Still warm, and her nails were painted this dark blue black color, I just held them. I willed myself to imagine a world without us and what a worthless world that would be.

She’s so beautiful. You don’t get tired of looking at her. You never worry if she’s smarter than you because you know she is. She’s funny without ever being mean. I love her, God I love her. I’m so lucky to love he, Van Houten.

You don’t get to choose if you get hurt in this world but you have a say in who hurts you. I like my choice and I hope she likes hers. Okay Hazel Grace?

28 Aug ♥ 1,777 notes ● via source - reblog
meghanbluebird:

discovergeneralmills:

Walk in.
See this.
Wat do?

Depends, do you own a dog?

meghanbluebird:

discovergeneralmills:

Walk in.

See this.

Wat do?

Depends, do you own a dog?

28 Aug ♥ 277,477 notes ● via source - reblog

thirsty-for-troye:

" haha jk we had sex"

28 Aug ♥ 97,688 notes ● via source - reblog
28 Aug ♥ 405,704 notes ● via source - reblog

sassykardashian:

sailingonsuccess:

sassykardashian:

Science side of tumblr how do I become a jellyfish

Jellyfish have no brains. You’re already pretty close.

Okay WOW

28 Aug ♥ 209,977 notes ● via source - reblog

nice-wig-janis:

"what did you even do before you joined tumblr"
image

28 Aug ♥ 46,421 notes ● via source - reblog
simsgonewrong:

Kinda odd way of riding :D

simsgonewrong:

Kinda odd way of riding :D

28 Aug ♥ 1,351 notes ● via source - reblog